It\u2019s tough when your fiercely independent parent is in denial about needing help. Perhaps they are having trouble with personal hygiene, driving, cooking meals, or doing yard work. Yet when you bring up hiring help or moving to assisted living, they get upset. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
Though it\u2019s not easy knowing what to do when elderly parents refuse help, the majority of families are facing this dilemma \u2014 77% of adult children<\/a> reported that their aging parents are refusing help or their advice.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Despite your loved one insisting that they don\u2019t need help, you know that they\u2019re struggling and want to fight for their well-being. Here\u2019s how to handle a stubborn parent and work together to make plans to get help.<\/p>\n\n\n\n There are several reasons why elderly parents refuse help and it\u2019s vital to understand your parent\u2019s motives, so you can address their concerns. Some of the most common reasons include:<\/p>\n\n\n\n By knowing these typical reasons, you can better strategize to persuade your parent to get help. No matter what they\u2019re feeling, you should listen to and validate their concerns. Often emphasizing with your parent can help you agree on priorities and make plans as a team.<\/p>\n\n\n\n The process of convincing your parents to accept care can take time and patience. If you\u2019re not sure how to approach this issue, here are some clear steps to get started. <\/p>\n\n\n\n It\u2019s essential that your family acts as a united front so that your parent isn\u2019t getting mixed messages. Discuss your parent\u2019s situation together and decide on who will be the point person for leading these conversations with your parent.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Don\u2019t be dismissive about your parent\u2019s concerns or emotions. Try to listen empathetically and understand their point of view. Simply lending an ear can help move forward the conversation, as your parent will feel heard and respected. <\/p>\n\n\n\n Often aging parents won\u2019t make a change for themselves, but they will for their kids or grandkids. Make it about you and gently explain to your parent that the current situation is becoming a burden for you. You might also suggest a longer relationship with the grandkids if your parent gets help and care.<\/p>\n\n\n\n If your parent recently left the stove on or had a fall, you can use these teachable moments to explain why getting help will keep them safe. The idea here isn\u2019t to scold but to highlight how worried you are and why you want to ensure their well-being by getting help.<\/p>\n\n\n\n There are so many misunderstandings about what senior living is. You can do wonders in convincing your parents by focusing on the benefits of these communities. Reinforce how assisted living communities will elevate their independence, let them pursue their favorite hobbies, give them peace of mind in a secure apartment or any other key concerns that your parent may have.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Choices are everything. Your parent should feel in control of changes, so be sure that you work together to define priorities and create a list of care options. In this way, your parent will feel like they haven\u2019t lost their independence and can choose how they want to get help.<\/p>\n\n\n\n If you\u2019re still struggling to get an aging parent to accept help, don\u2019t give up yet. This process can take months of strategizing to get results, so stay calm and try these next steps.<\/p>\n\n\n\n One way to make progress with your parent is to do a planning activity together. Sit down and ask your parent to help you brainstorm priorities and hopes for their life in the coming years. <\/p>\n\n\n\n For example, your parent may be keen on keeping a garden or continuing to go to their community church. They may also be worried about a health emergency and want to prioritize their health care. This list will be helpful to refer back to when discussing care options. <\/p>\n\n\n\n Often senior living communities don\u2019t look anything like your parent imagined \u2013 they\u2019re so much more vibrant and modern! Schedule a tour at a community like Varenita so your parent can visualize the beautiful campus and resident life. Sometimes this is enough to get your parent interested in moving to a senior living community. <\/p>\n\n\n\n Your parent may regard the advice of outside voices more than your own. Get in touch with somebody they respect such as their doctor, spiritual leader or friend and ask them for help. Get your parent to sit down with this figure and talk about their future in order to nudge them into making a change.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Remember: you can\u2019t force your parent to accept help. While it can be frustrating and upsetting to see your parent in decline, it\u2019s important not to let your feelings ruin your relationship. Find an outlet to get out that anger, such as talking to a friend, therapist or support group. <\/p>\n\n\n\n Release those negative emotions elsewhere so that you can maintain a good relationship with your parent and continue making progress in getting them help. <\/p>\n\n\n\n At this point, you\u2019ve tried numerous strategies for getting your parent to accept help. If you\u2019re still not getting results, you should continue to build your relationship with your parent and continue the conversation over time. Specifically, you should:<\/p>\n\n\n\n Dealing with a stubborn elderly parent who refuses help can be frustrating. Yet with these strategies, you may have better chances of convincing your parent to get help for the good of the entire family. It\u2019s tough when your fiercely independent parent is in denial about needing help. Perhaps they are having trouble with personal hygiene, driving, cooking meals, or doing yard work. Yet when you bring up hiring help or moving to assisted living, they get upset. Though it\u2019s not easy knowing what to do when elderly parents refuse […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":1463,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[11],"tags":[7],"class_list":["post-1185","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-advice-information","tag-blog"],"acf":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/varenita.com\/west-cobb\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1185","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/varenita.com\/west-cobb\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/varenita.com\/west-cobb\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/varenita.com\/west-cobb\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/varenita.com\/west-cobb\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=1185"}],"version-history":[{"count":2,"href":"https:\/\/varenita.com\/west-cobb\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1185\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":1584,"href":"https:\/\/varenita.com\/west-cobb\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1185\/revisions\/1584"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/varenita.com\/west-cobb\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/1463"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/varenita.com\/west-cobb\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=1185"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/varenita.com\/west-cobb\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=1185"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/varenita.com\/west-cobb\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=1185"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}
\n\n\n\nWhy Elderly Parents Refuse Care<\/h2>\n\n\n\n
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\n\n\n\nHow to Help Your Elderly Parents Accept Care <\/h2>\n\n\n\n
1. Get Your Family Members on the Same Page <\/h3>\n\n\n\n
2. Listen Closely to Your Parent\u2019s Concerns<\/h3>\n\n\n\n
3. Make an Argument for You and the Grandkids<\/h3>\n\n\n\n
4. Use Teachable Moments to Highlight Concerns<\/h3>\n\n\n\n
5. Reframe the Benefits of Senior Living<\/h3>\n\n\n\n
6. Give Them Control Over Choices<\/h3>\n\n\n\n
\n\n\n\nWhat to Do if Your Aging Parent Still Refuses Help<\/h2>\n\n\n\n
1. Write Down a List of Priorities Together<\/h3>\n\n\n\n
2. Take a Senior Living Tour so They Can See the Benefits Firsthand<\/h3>\n\n\n\n
3. Bring in a Respected Figure, such as a Doctor, Spiritual Leader, Friend, etc.<\/h3>\n\n\n\n
4. Find an Outlet for Your Feelings<\/h3>\n\n\n\n
\n\n\n\nFinal Steps for Helping Your Elderly Parent<\/h2>\n\n\n\n
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\n\n\n\nSupport Your Elderly Parent in Getting Help<\/h2>\n\n\n\n
At Varenita’s senior living community in West Cobb, GA<\/a>, we\u2019re here to support you during this difficult process. Get in touch<\/a> to experience senior living ReEnvisioned and learn how we can support your aging parent in the coming years.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"